Cuz I'm just a girl (blogger)

If I had to classify myself in the blog world, I'd say I am on paper what I am in life - adventurous at heart but cautious in practice, a bit of a flirt, a very small amount rebel, sincere, sometimes witty, de vez en cuando boring (self criticism is so much easier in another language) and always, always looking for something I can't quite put my finger on. Many of the blogs I'm drawn to, and those by women especially, are the much the same (with added humor and/or insight!). I think it's the sincerity that is most important to me - both in my writing and in the blogs I read.

I bring this up because for a blogger like myself, there are an array of topics that are almost sure to be broached: love, heartbreak, family, frustrations at work, the importance of friends, what challenges us, and babies. Babies you say? But of course! What gal who is closer to thirty than she is to twenty doesn't have to address this at some point or another - whether she wants to or not?

As I read the horror stories of other single and/or childless women I tend to thank my lucky stars that I have been spared most of them. I have very few, if any, people in my life who greet me with such gems as, "Still haven't found Mr. Right?" Thanks to siblings who have blessed my parents with ten grand kids, there's no pressure from them to introduce more kidlets to the world. Enough of my friends are still childless that I don't face parties in which I'm the only one that's there for the cocktails and not Bongo the Clown. Still, baby talk does creep in in the scariest of ways from time to time. Social pressure might be bad, but biological pressure is a hell of a lot worse.

I was reminded today that regardless of whether I have found Mr. Right or not, my body may not accommodate starting a family once I finally get to a point where that's wanted or logical in any way. As much as I'd like to shout, "ya right! My mom was 37 when she had me!" it's true: your body makes this decision for you. Some women can get pregnant easily at any age, some women can't get pregnant at all, and some have a hell of a lot more chance in their twenties than they do in their thirties.

Which of the above categories do I fit into? Which do I want to fit into? In honesty, I haven't a clue. But as my future plans now include a grad program that has me graduating and ready to embark on an entirely new career at 30 - I suppose as reluctant as I am to start thinking about this, I probably should. It seems pretty premature given my naked ring finger, but it's harder and harder to ignore that whether I'm ready or not for what lays ahead, if I want to be prepared, I need to start planning. Ugh.



*Do yourself a favor and google images for "babies" - it's kind of terrifying what comes up. Also - I think the image that I chose will only be funny to people who know me in real life.